Changing how you connect with yourself and others.
Do you notice common patterns in how you connect with others that result in you moving inauthentically or in dysfunctional dynamics with others? Do you crave deeper, more qualitative connections that go beyond the superficial ideas of current events and the weather?
The desire for connection with others and ourselves is a basic need that is typically out of mind. When it is ignored, it can negatively impact other parts of our constellation such as our ability to think or eat. When we struggle to create safe and meaningful connections, we may find it difficult to have a sense of purpose or belonging. Additionally, feelings of shame, confusion and anxiety may be further worsened as a lack of secure connections.
You may ask yourself, “why does this keep happening to me?”, “am I destined to be alone?” or even “is there something wrong with me?”
Anxiety, depression, and even physical pain can be a consequence of dysfunctional connections. You may feel on edge as you try to impress others with all of the things you have accomplished in your life. You may also feel as though there is no hope due to continuously being rejected when trying to establish authentic connections. Your internal world may become dull as the expression your authentic self becomes limited. Your body may feel tight due to feeling as though you have to protect yourself from others.
Perhaps your gender identity prevents you from being able to express yourself in a way that feels genuine to you. Maybe people treat you differently based on the people you are sexually attracted to. This may create intense feelings of shame and guilt, where you have to hide who you are, so you can safely navigate interactions with others. These feelings can also make you feel unsafe in your own body. This can make you feel alone in the world, resulting in dysfunctional ways of coping such as substance abuse, unsafe sexual habits, or self-harm. If this sounds familiar, you may need some help to develop healthy coping mechanisms as well as process some of the traumatic events that you have experienced.
Perhaps you identify as Indigenous or First Nations and either you or a family member suffered the atrocities of residential schools. Maybe you experience intergenerational trauma as a result of not being able to connect with your heritage or having a member diagnosed with a mental illness. This may create intense feelings of anger and grief, as you continue to suffer the consequences of severed connections from your culture but also the possibilities of what you could have become if you were able to express your culture safely. You may find that alcohol or marijuana are excessively used to numb the pain or block out the trauma. If this sounds familiar, you may need a safe space to be able to process your experiences as well as, a place to be able to reconnect with the creator.
- Establishing and maintaining the conversation between your body and mind, so that you are more grounded and centered.
- Developing healthy and effective strategies for you to tolerate and cope with the stress that you experience.
- Processing the traumatic events that you have experienced so that your nervous system can properly regulate.
- Empowering you to create healthy boundaries both internally and externally so that you can develop safe and meaningful connections.